Civic responsiblity
I learnt that some children’s lack of motivation to study might be due to lack of care and attention from parents. It is likely that some parents might accidentally neglect their children because all their attention is on working and earning a living for the family. Another possibility could be the altered family structure because of divorce or separation.
I learnt this when I asked this boy during the first session how his father might feel if he failed his exams because he kept choosing the ‘devil’ option, and his reply was that his father does not care about his studies. That got me thinking about the possibility of him feeling like his father does not care about other areas of his life apart from studies, and how that might affect how he grows up to be like. I do not know anything about his family, but I saw the likelihood of lack of attention from his father.
This learning is important because when children start to feel unloved, they tend to be at a higher risk of behavioural problems, delinquency, and mental health issues, which are far worse than just not studying (Khaleque, 2017). Hence, it is important to address this issue both at a governmental level and personal level. Though I cannot change the work hours of parents, I can still contribute to mitigating this issue.
In light of this learning, in the future, I can volunteer at student care centres or after school programmes to help tutor children who are likely sent there because their parents are working and may not have much time to spend with them. Although nothing can beat the love and care from a parent, but as a volunteer, I can provide them with some of my attention and show them that people care about them and how they are doing.
Personal growth
I learnt the value of empathy when interacting with people of different backgrounds. Empathy is important on a societal and interpersonal level as it enables people to take on the perspective of another and react compassionately (Riess, 2017). Especially for helping professions like social work, empathy is a big part as they need to understand and feel the emotions of their clients in order to treat them with compassion and care (Riess, 2017).
I learnt this when I interacted with the different children in my group. There was this girl who was very uncooperative, finding every activity including the icebreaker games boring. She also kept wanting touch our props and talked a lot, so my first thought of her was that she was annoying and I was frustrated trying to get her cooperation. However, I should have tried to see things from her point of view before labelling her as disruptive. I realised that her behaviour could have been because of her low self-esteem, from how she gave up after failing once during our obstacle course, saying that it was hard and she didn’t want to do it. Another incident was when one child told one of the facilitators and I that he did not like one of the facilitators because she kept shouting. That made me learn that while trying to enforce discipline, we should also think about how our methods may affect the others.
This learning is important as no matter where we go, there will always be some people who may act a certain way which irritates us, but instead of acting upon our negative feelings, it is definitely more beneficial to try to empathise with the other. Empathising with people can prevent misunderstandings and prevent impulsivity as a result of negative emotions.
In light of this learning, in the future when I encounter a situation whereby, I get frustrated and irritated with someone, I will calm myself down and try to see things from their perspective. Recently in my CCA, I have also been annoyed with a few of my committee members, so I will try to understand that they have their reasons for acting a certain way. When they tell me their reason, I will accept it and support them instead of getting angry and being fixated on them being a certain kind of person.
(698 words)
References
​
Khaleque, A. (2017). Worldwide implications of parental love and lack of love on children’s and adults’ psychological adjustment and maladjustment: Meta-analytic evidence. Journal of Mental Disorders and Treatment, 4(1), 150. doi:10.4172/2471-271X.1000150
Riess, H. (2017). The science of empathy. Journal of Patient Experience, 4(2), 74-77.
doi: 10.1177/2374373517699267